FADE RIFT [INBOX]
LADY LAKSHMI
( Lady Lakshmi, Bai Saheba, Rani Lakshmibai )
( Lady Lakshmi, Bai Saheba, Rani Lakshmibai )
VOICE | ACTION | NOTES
- Unavaliable To All:
- 30mins around dawn
Only to Voice: - Hour training morning and evening
- Any time she's gone riding.
- When she's in the field.
Only to Book: - When she's otherwise in a meeting, leave a message.
- Very late at night or early in the morning.
Other: - She usually takes her morning meals in the mess hall with everyone else.
- Her days are usually spent in Kirkwall seeing to either her personal business or Inquisition tasks.
- She has a bath twice a day, every day.

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I may. Or I may merely go mad, already my eyes are rotting. It is the first signs of the blood-drunk.
[ She exhales tiredly. ]
The Hunter of Hunters is not here to stop me. Not all of us turn, but enough of us. Hunters and clerics, we're the worst of it. The finest beasts.
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You are what we would call a pureblood then. Someone who is born this way?
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[ Softly, sadly. ]
It is from my life in Yharnam. They use a special blood to heal, that is why I went when I was young-- blood to heal my sister. Instead I stayed, and joined the Hunt. The beasts were fewer then, it wasn't so obvious-- that it was the blood.
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Can you turn others with this... blood?
[ She thinks of one particular thing. The blackwater. But no, that was her blood, changed. No longer blood inside the phial, inside of her. ]
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[ She pauses. ]
But I am afraid what would happen-- if any of these mages had their hands upon it.
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Oh, yes. There is a problem here, isn't there? ]
Have you told our Commanders?
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[ Even if Lakshmi were to say yes, Anna is too reserved in this to simply believe her. But she does, at least, trust Lakshmi with this. ]
I will run out, sooner than later. There are only fourteen now.
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[ She breathes. Slowly. Trying to make sense of this in pieces. ]
But what about the blood in your body? Is it still... changed?
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[ No real rebuke to the tone, it's a statement. She has heard enough history to know Thedas is no better, that the same ugliness runs through their veins. What was this continuing war, if not that. ]
I am human. I am not vileblood. I am not beast. I am not kin.
[ This is almost a prayer. Something she holds shivering to in the darkest uncertainties of the Hunt. ]
I am still human.
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[ She breathes on the thought. It's a lot. It's more than a lot. She doesn't not think Anna told her this simply to make idle conversation. Because she fancied revealing this sort of truth to someone who she had seen hunt monsters like that because she wanted idle chanter. ]
For how much longer will you remain so?
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Until my mind breaks. The only reason it hasn't is because I am a coward. I ran away from what I saw. I went back to Yharnam and I killed... night after night, every beast. To remind myself I was not one of them.
[ Drenched herself in their stinking blood. Drank and drank and drank on blood-tinged air. ]
I can't go backwards. And I can't go forwards.
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Alright. So what do we do about it? What warning signs do I look out for?
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Early on, our eyes occlude. The pupils collapse, and rot out. Many of us bandage it, carry on. The mind is next-- aggressive and irrational, losing track of friend and foe. Always on the Hunt.
[ Her aggression comes and goes. ]
We start to see beasts everywhere, in everyone. We forget who we are, the names of those we know and love. And then... it doesn't matter anymore. All that matters is blood.
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In some ways - it is familiar. The Knights, their isolation. Being removed and only seeing the worse. She has seen what happens when they stop caring like they should. How they no longer want to be able to tell the difference, and how easily that disdain had been twisted.
But more readily than that, she has seen what happens to old soldiers. That begin to see a battlefield in everything. That spends so long fighting, they don't think to raise a hand to their children and wives where they never would have before, who scream in their sleep about the things they've seen and done.
Lakshmi is not different, to any of them. ]
Aggression. [ A pause, the quill stops. ] A battle-field sort of rage that will lash out suddenly? Or just a growing ire?
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[ She should report that she was overcome with it for a time at Ghislain, had been snappish and violent when ordered to retreat. Her own memory of that, however, is hazy. She remembers the aftermath of the battle more clearly: cheerful and heady on blood. ]
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Apart from the eyes, will anything else begin to manifest in your body?
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So from the moment your eyes go, I must be on guard for more intimate changes?
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Yes. It's quite--
[ More than an inconvenience, that doesn't even begin to cover it. ]
I'm sorry.
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For what?
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If I have ire for anyone in truth, it's those that don't acknowledge the hurt they could cause. Never be sorry for taking responsibility for yourself.
[ She wets her lip. Yet. That was difficult, and the drumming returns. ]
But that does leave a question. When the time comes. Would you prefer me to dispatch you?
cw: more overtly that suicide...
[ She exhales heavily. She doesn't really feel unburdened, at all. ]
If I've the mind to see it, I will be my own keeper. But every hunter I've seen has had no inkling-- when it had gone too far.
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[ There's almost a pleasant note in this, as though she has very precisely and very quickly killed plenty enough beasts herself. ]
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