(They aren't my titles, Misato, they are the tenets by which I live my life, that have dictated my whole being. Brahmin meant that when I was told to get married at 13, per the traditions of my caste. No matter how it terrified me to become a queen when I was a poor, half starved mess of a child, I did it. Queen meant I would never have the luxury of ever belonging to myself ever again. My life has been public property since I told the priest to tie the marital knot extra tight so it might never loosen. Whether it was the praises of my people calling me holy, or my enemies pamphlets calling me whore.
And they mean, most of all, that I never get to look away. From any of it. )
[ This is your blade now, Manu, put out your hands, hold them flat. This will hurt, so you never forget what this is -
The stung red line on her palms. Where she is at present, she curls her fingers into those line, faded to no existence under the many others that have followed. The pinched feeling at the front of her brow that is a budding frustration and misery at being so - out of step, when her whole life she has been certain about who she is, what she is, how life was. ]
(I do not offer excuse - but I forgot that no one else has had such things happen to them since I was younger Shinji is now. So when he protested, I taught in the way I was taught and have since lived my life.)
no subject
And they mean, most of all, that I never get to look away. From any of it. )
[ This is your blade now, Manu, put out your hands, hold them flat. This will hurt, so you never forget what this is -
The stung red line on her palms. Where she is at present, she curls her fingers into those line, faded to no existence under the many others that have followed. The pinched feeling at the front of her brow that is a budding frustration and misery at being so - out of step, when her whole life she has been certain about who she is, what she is, how life was. ]
( I do not offer excuse - but I forgot that no one else has had such things happen to them since I was younger Shinji is now. So when he protested, I taught in the way I was taught and have since lived my life. )